Unearthed

We have taken to 'farming' in our backyard -- tomatoes, mustard greens, a variety of lettuces and herbs.  

While turning over the earth to plant, or when weeding, long lost items surface in the garden. Lumps of coal from decades back when the house had a coal furnace. Marbles. Bits of glass. Loose change.  



They seem to work their way to the surface and appear after a rain where a day earlier the earth was just earth.

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This made me reflect on how everyday experiences can surface unexpected emotions:

• An innocuous comment at work triggers tears from a colleague in the next cubicle
• A joke at a party makes a guest turn away and withdraw
• A simple request between friends triggers resentment that had lain dormant for years
  

Unexpected and unearthed emotions can feel very uncomfortable.
Especially when they seem to surface out of nowhere. And even more so when they break into a day where you were feeling just fine.  Emotions hidden and out of sight can quickly become disruptive.

These feelings often signal what is important to us at any given moment. They direct our attention to what matters.  The key is slowing down enough to feel the feeling. 

To let the feeling linger, un-interrupted and un-analyzed.

To feel it without explaining it to yourself.

Then, as it passes we can turn our attention to understanding what lies under the feeling.   

If we react too quickly and don't tune in to what the unexpected emotion is telling us, we are more likely to:

• Do something we regret
• Get angry or blame someone for relief
• Intellectualize "it" and replay the same thoughts over and over
  
• Distract ourselves with other thoughts or activities to shut the emotion down
  

Back to the loose change in the garden. A dime that turned up the other day gave me exact change for a baguette I bought for $2.10.  And the dime's unusual patina from all those years in the garden might unearth other stories, now that it's back in general circulation.

Giving you my ten cents worth,
Coach Minda